Valentine's Day
A few years ago, I made a major faux pas on Valentine’s Day.
I had been out of town on business for a week and in the rush to
make it home, I forgot "the stuff." I was within five miles
of home and I was tempted to roll on in and beg her forgiveness and
say, I was tired, or that I am a complete idiot, or some other lame
excuse, but I knew that Jilda would not have forgotten Valentine’s
Day. She never had and I did not expect she would start.
So, I made a quick u-turn and headed back to the nearest store, which
was about ten miles away. I was astonished to find they had NO Valentine
cards. So it was back to the truck and to the next store...still
no cards...back in the truck and another eight miles back to Wal-Mart.
To my utter amazement, the only cards they had were "To My Favorite
Sister". Not only did they not have cards, but also there were
no roses...indeed no flowers of any kind. I was a dead man. I thought
quickly and snatched one of the sister cards thinking I can scribble
through sister part and make a little joke...problem solved. So there
I was, standing in line with the lame card and a pot of basil from
the garden shop. I tentatively headed home.
Women are much more creative and can get away with stuff like forgetting
birthdays and Valentine’s Day. My wife said one of her girlfriends
forgot to buy her boyfriend a card or gift on Valentine's Day, so
when he came in, she was sitting on the sofa in her underwear with
a six-pack of beer and an open can of chocolate syrup. The boyfriend
thought it was the greatest gift in the world.
My wife on the other hand was not amused at my oversight. While she
did not say anything, I could see the hurt in her eyes. As luck would
have it, she had scurried around all day buying aged steaks, French
bread, red wine, scented candles and a bouquet of beautiful flowers.
I managed to get through that night, but I made a promise to myself
that never again would I let that happen. And I haven't.
A few days ago, I went to Barnes & Noble and bought a killer
Victorian Valentine card and a box of Godiva chocolates. I also made
arrangements with a local beauty shop for my wife to have a manicure
and pedicure.
I did good. However, I did stop at that same Wal-Mart to pick up
a bottle of bubbly, and for kicks I strolled by the Valentine Shop.
There were guys frantically looking for candy and flowers to no avail.
I saw one poor guy holding a pack of Reese’s Cups thumbing
through the sympathy cards and shaking his head in disbelief. I thought "you
poor devil, I bet you won't do this next year."
It's like I always say, "every day's a school day." I hope
you all had a very Happy Valentine’s Day.
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